Tuesday, October 16, 2012
24 years ago.....
I was always annoyed by my little brother just like any other sister. We fought....even after he was diagnosed. I actually looked at him one rainy day while playing in the garage and said "It's ok, cause when you die your trucks will be mine." How awful, I still feel guilty for that to this day. The horrible things we say as children.
Today it has been 24 years since Adam died....I was 8. I remember vividly that day....and night. It forever changed everything.....it was my loss of innocence which my sister would tell you is where my fear of clowns come from! Yes, I deal with everything with a bit of humor. I was never the invincible teen, I knew what could happen.
Cherish every moment, make sure you do today and say today what you need to. Tomorrow may not come....always kiss your kids goodbye, good night, and just for no reason. God and I struggle back and forth with my anger and my pain, but today will be a good day! Adam my have only lived for four years but the point is he lived. He loved everyone and wanted to save everything. I commend my parents for allowing Adam to be involved in his treatment, I realize as a parent now how difficult it had to be to allow treatment to stop....even if there was very little hope of success. I no longer blame them...they did an amazing job thinking of what was best for Adam as well as me!
I am who I am today....because I knew this amazing little man! All my love is sent to you in heaven today!
Posted by Butterfly at 6:09 AM